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| Those eyes overflowing with annoyance every time you glance in my direction. Sometimes our eyes meet and i got ready to mouth a greeting.
But your eyes, what happened?
The sparkle in them, the magic that radiates out of it. Where'd it go?
Instead, i see myself looking into a set of eyes, a total void of emotions. I can feel hatred. And it prevents me from smiling at you anymore.
Even the way you walk is different now. I believe the walk has been carefully practiced? i dont know.
Its been a while since i've written someting like this.
Miss you? of coure i do
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I brought half my closet with me in my bag over to my cousins place. We only tried on two pairs of clothes because it was already late. How sad. But we're doing more of this stuff soon, when i'm free and when there's more time. My cousin's begging me to start doing make-up tutorials on youtube, but i'll do it when im bored and when i have enough confidence with my skills. Oh, have i mentioned about today? Its the best saturday of 2010 so far. Thanks to a certain someone, who made my day just by hanging out with me for 3hours, and whom i shared a nice warm hug with. After four years, i still can't believe i actually talked to him. Its so surreal. But it went better than i expected it to be. I hope, we'll meet again, soon. Till then, imma watch more of my jdramas. Im deprived of them. | | |
| Hate. I am an angsty 16 turning on 17 year old teenager.
Of the 16years of my whole life, i still don't get hatred.
What is it?
What fuels it?
What makes it fun?
Why do you bitch? Why do you get annoyed? Why do you get into fights?
Why dont you forgive? Why dont you forget?
Sometimes, I bitch too. I'm not a perfect human. In fact, i'm mean. I'm honestly mean. When i don't like something, it shows on my face, sometimes too obvious. When i dislike an attitude, i tell.
But i can never hate. I can never hate.
Why? Am i not normal?
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I've been sacrificing my nights for a number of reasons. I've been feeling rather strange too.
Maybe its the mixture of new emotions that's starting to harass me.
But it feels good.
It feels right.
It feels perfect.
Everytime i walk down the same 'ol empty sidewalk home, my thoughts are constantly running. And i love how my usual thoughts about the world, is replaced. It's funny how I changed in the past few months. How positive i've become with embracing these new emotions.
I wish it stays like this though. I'm afraid it wont last.
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School's been really great recently till i'm afraid of graduation. | | |
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